halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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