This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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