i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Michael Bay diarrhea
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
There's always time for handjobs
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
