there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize