and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
