Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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