I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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