Duck Duck Cougar?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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