Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
