If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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