Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
