Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
