My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
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