okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
