I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
We need to get me chipped asap
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
