We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
