he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
