break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
