Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
