he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
