its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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