hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
