Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
A bitchslap is in order.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
