so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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