How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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