the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
we made out on top of his cat.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
