you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
she pinky promised me she was 18
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
What a dumb baby whore.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
its liver damage thursday
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
