The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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