He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Slut skills are useful in every country.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
