So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
