Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
