You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
It's official drugs can't kill me
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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