DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
