At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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