The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I need help removing her.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
