mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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