Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize