Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
