it wasn't lemon gatorade
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
