Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Me too!
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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