Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
