So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
