its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
