Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
