yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize