I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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