so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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