i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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