I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
