dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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